London 2012 Opening Ceremony review [July 28th in old personal blog]

London 2012 has begun. And it begun in a way many didn’t expect. I fully went into Danny Boyle’s epic 3 hour+ opening ceremony with cynicism glasses well and truly placed upon my head. In the same frame of mind as when watching The X Factor or Made in Chelsea, my sole goal was to take the piss out of what was to be an overblown, kitsch look at Britain.

And the prologue did much to cement the idea this would happen. The Britain Boyle had created; of picnics, cricket, football, beehives, quaint cottages, lush green fields, did little to remove the idea in foreigners minds that Britain was essentially Bag End with regular sized people. But then, roll VT. A swooping fly through of London, visiting all the sights accompanied by Sex Pistols and the Eastenders theme tune. Whilst all CGI, it was a kinetic, exciting way to kick off proceedings officially.

Then something happened. The London Symphony Orchestra began playing Elgar’s Nimrod and Tour de France yellow jersey victor Bradley Wiggins rang the largest harmonically tuned bell. A chorus of Jerusalem, followed by Danny Boy (a little egotistical when taking into account Boy could easily be misconstrued as Boyle), Flower of Scotland and Cym Rhondda, a song for each country, rang out and welcomed the arrival of Kenneth Branagh as Isambard Kingdom Brunel to ruin this idyllic scene and bring on the “satanic mills” Jerusalem talks about.

And what a way did they appear. After Branagh’s reciting of Caliban’s monologue from The Tempest, the peaceful English countryside was torn apart to the sound of pounding drums and industrial workers rising from Glastonbury Tor. The transition between rural and industrial here was simply breathtaking. As the farmers slowly removed their cottages and farms, made obsolete by these new creations, huge smoke stack chimneys rose from the ground, billowing smoke everywhere as bosses surveyed both their achievements and their workers. In a few minutes, the hippy loving Glasto-alike was replaced with Barnsley circa 1920. Pandemonium, the name of this act, is a more than apt title, taking inspiration from John Milton’s hell in Paradise Lost.

Britain’s most motley groups parade around after this transformation, from the suffragettes, to the Jarrow marchers, Chelsea pensioners to the complete historically accurate 72 Beatles members and a Yellow Submarine as the Olympic rings were forged in an orgasm of light and sound as they rose into the air to join together; the shot that is no doubt on the cover of every morning newspaper today.

But we’re nowhere near done yet! An homage to both the NHS and children’s literature was up next, which had some very strong and not very well hidden subtext relating to the Conservative’s attempted destruction of the NHS. Whilst children and nurses played, witches, The Childcatcher, a 30ft Voldemort and many other fairy tale villains (the Conservative party) terrorised the stage. That is until an army of Mary Poppins fly onto the stage to take down the impressive figure of Voldemort.
 
Things just accelerated from here. In what was possibly a section entirely designed for me, as a person that owns EVERY SINGLE James Bond film on DVD, Daniel Craig’s James Bond MEETS THE ACTUAL QUEEN! Not someone dressed as The Queen, but HRH Queen Elizabeth II herself. He takes her on a flight of London, becoming less and less of a secret agent as more people start waving and recognising him, before parachuting into the stadium. Whilst some Americans actually believed the Queen parachuted in (with The New York Times actually writing a piece to debunk this), it was still a hell of an entrance for a lady who normally just walks in.

And then Rowan Atkinson does something spectacular. He actually regains his funny. Whilst I know Mr Bean is a big international hit, I’m not a fan. So I rolled my eyes as he took part in a rendition of the theme tune to Chariots of Fire. It was a very British type of humour, only heightened by the next act; a celebration of everything British. From Michael Fish’s failure to predict the weather accurately, to Gregory’s Girl, The Archers, David Bowie, Brookside (particularly that pre-watershed lesbian kiss apparently making it’s showing at the ceremony the first lesbian kiss EVER shown on Saudi TV!), Dizzee Rascal, The Rolling Stones and finally an appearance from the inventor of the World Wide Web himself, Sir Tim Berners-Lee (who actually sent a tweet whilst on stage), the final act was both a celebration of modern technology and modern British culture, something a culture nut like me was loving; attempting to spot all of the clips and songs used.

It wasn’t all exciting and bombastic. Twice did it take a more sombre, but emotionally beautiful tone. Once during Pandemonium in which soldiers removed their hats and the stadium was taken by silence apart from one lone whistle to commemorate those lost in the wars and again with a choreographed dance while Emeli Sande sung “Abide With Me” to “all those that couldn’t be there”.
Then, after all this, came the athlete’s parade, a spectacle of thousands of men and women from some countries GCSE geography neglected to tell me existed and finally the lighting of the cauldron. Probably one of the best kept secrets of the night, no-one quite knew exactly what it was. Every country had someone holding a cup like thing which looked more like a potty than anything else and it was these that made up the cauldron. A wonderful  transfer of the flame from old Olympic heroes such as Dame Kelly Holmes and Sir Steve Redgrave to the new British talents, a literal passing of the flame, and a beautiful song made just for the ceremony entitled Caliban’s Dream (sung by that bloke out of Two Door Cinema Club which felt a tad weird), the pottys were lit and slowly ascended into the sky to form a giant flame. Impressive it most certainly was and an apt end to a mesmerising ceremony.

Completely cynicism free, Danny Boyle’s Olympic ceremony was a proper celebration of Britain, not some falsified fairy tale version. Beijing’s opening was more a show of their strength and power and a totalitarian nation, similar to the Nazis in the Berlin Olympics. It was mechanistic and strong. As a country with a lot less power than we used to, Boyle felt there was no need to do it. This was very much a ceremony for the British. Judging by American reactions of it, it was often difficult to know what was going on for them. But it was an introduction to what makes Britian not that bad rather than a more general show of power and money.

A mix of high culture and low culture seemed an accurate way to show how Britain is. From Shakespeare and Blake, to Ken Loach and grime music, everything was covered here and nothing was left out. It showed a Britain that loved its welfare state, its rich heritage, one that didn’t dwell on its mistakes and embraced those things that have shaped it to what it is today.

It really did seem to be hated by the Tories, however, with a certain MP on Twitter denouncing it as essentially, leftist bullshit. Rumour has it that Jeremy Hunt even tried to persuade Boyle not to add the NHS section to the ceremony. It was a celebration of the liberal, multicultural, egalitarian side of Britain, paid for entirely by a Conservative government opposed or just ignorant to such ideas which made it all the more sweeter.

I tried to be cynical throughout and make jokes but it was so difficult when it was such a magnificent spectacle. Cinematic, moving, funny and dippy as anything, it made very little sense but was enjoyable as anything to watch. Boyle has made some mis-steps in his career but this is not one of them. Kudos Danny Boyle. Kudos.

The Dark Knight Rises [July 22nd 2012 in old personal blog]

Take a trip with me back to 2003, if you will. News hits that Christopher Nolan, by this point known primarily for the mind bending Memento (Following was very much his training ground and Insomnia, being a remake, didn’t really let the Nolan mind fuckery properly shine) announced he was to reboot a franchise which had ended in 1997 with gratuitous Clooney nipple and terrible ice based puns. That was the cinematic exploits of Batman. People were apprehensive due to how bad that film actually was but the promise of a retcon of the franchise and a new gritty tone to be taken on restored some people’s hopes that maybe, just maybe, we could get a Batman that didn’t feel outdated in a post 9/11 world. What appeared on our screens in 2005 under the title Batman Begins was what Nolan had promised, and then some. Corruption, moral dilemmas and a world that felt real; where Batman could actually operate without feeling like a flight of fancy, all shaped this film, and the series, into something spectacular. The Dark Knight took it a step further by introducing Heath Ledger’s Joker, an enemy so psychotic and implacable that it took a franchise known for its campy feel (see: Adam West’s Batman) and took it in a terrifying direction. The Dark Knight Rises does nothing to sully the reputation of the previous two films and acts as a fantastic conclusion to both the series as a story and as a set of ideas.

Eight years have passed since Batman took the fall for Harvey Dent’s actions in an attempt to restore the people’s faith and give them hope. In that time, the memory of Dent has successfully cleaned the streets of Gotham and turned it from the grimy slum look of Batman Begins to a city that has all the colour and joy of a newborn baby (the first of many “risings”). However, the truth behind the events of the night of Dent’s death weighs heavy on both Jim Gordon (Gary Oldman) and Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) with the former losing faith in himself and the other placed in self-inforced exile within Wayne Manor. An attack on things close to both (Gotham for Gordon/Batman and Wayne Enterprises/his reputation for Wayne) by the formidable Bane (Tom Hardy) leads them to be brought out of their shell to defend it. Each has their own sidekick in their endeavours. Gordon and Batman gain rookie cop, John Blake Joseph Gordon Levitt), while Wayne gains a member of the Wayne Enterprises board Miranda Tate (Marion Cotillard). Each of these draws their respective “hero” out of their shells in order to stop the chaos that besets Gotham.

Throughout the film, there is an element of finality everywhere. Wayne’s fragile state both mentally and physically, helped by the assistance of a walking stick, is prominent throughout; a man born into wealth but unsure what to do with it, a man with an entire mansion to himself who relies on the company of his butler and surrounding himself with, what Tyler Durden referred to as “single serving friends”. Despite the clean streets of Gotham, Gordon realises that just one tug on his web of lies surrounding the legacy of Dent could bring the house of cards tumbling down with severe force. Everything is coming to an end but how can it when everything looks so rosy?
That job is given to the mercenary Bane. His mission, to begin with, is very much aimed solely at destroying the reputation of Bruce Wayne so that a rival corporation, unhappy with their lowly position within Wayne Enterprises, can climb the ladder an absorb the bankrupt company. But this Bane isn’t quite the dumb thug of Batman & Robin. This Bane is one with as much intelligence as ability to crush skulls. A member of the League of Shadows, the organisation Wayne joined to overcome his fear and embrace Batman, he is hell bent on succeeding where Ra’s Al-Ghul failed. His nihilistic journey to create a self-defined “utopia” is portrayed, by Bane, as liberating the people, this time from the oppression of the police rather than from lack of intervention as in Batman Begins, yet Bane is a manipulator and his mission is not for the benefit of the people but for the benefit of himself.

Tom Hardy is fantastic as Bane, not only portraying the intellect and torture that Batman & Robin never showed because it was too busy making Arnold Schwarzenneger tell shitty ice based jokes, but as a physical presence. This is a guy that manages to surpass Batman physically to the point where it seems like Batman has no chance of defeating this beast of a man. Punches break walls, his attacks are both devastatingly powerful yet deceptively quick. As such, the fight between Batman and Bane are ones of “edge of your seat” tension. Bane is out to beat Batman both physically and mentally. He wants to break him. And that’s scary. While The Scarecrow had fear itself and The Joker had psychosis as his ally, Bane needs nothing more than himself to really put fear into people’s hearts. Oh and a big ass nuclear bomb.

Anne Hathaway also provides a moral ambiguous role, albeit it one that looks a lot better in skin tight lycra, as Selina Kyle, known to many as Catwoman although the name is never uttered once in the film. Here she retains her Robin Hood-esque cat burglary but with a more physically dangerous presence than that of Michelle Pfeiffer’s. She understands Bruce’s need to begin again but also holds  desire for self-preservation by any means necessary, providing a warped mirror view of Batman as many of the best characters in the series have (Dent with his legal process of justice, Bane and Ra’s with their desire to clean the streets etc). She also looks amazing in skin tight lycra, have I said that?
Like the previous two films, The Dark Knight Rises also packs in plenty of set pieces. The football stadium explosion to the isolation of Gotham City to the eventual battle between Bane’s army and the police (the latter provided real spectacle simply due to the scale and chaos that it brings. While the focus is on Batman and Bane, there is fighting everywhere else too) are all stand out pieces showing the true scale of Bane’s plans to create a tabula rasa on which he can build the League of Shadows’ idea of a utopia. And yet, the real moments in The Dark Knight Rises are the smaller emotional moments. Alfred confronting Bruce Wayne in hopes that he can persuade him to just stay out of sight (with a truly emotional monologue from Michael Caine cementing him as a truly fantastic British actor), Blake confronting Gordon about the lies surrounding Dent (another scene stealer from JGL), the first appearance of Selina Kyle or even just the realisation of a hero’s identity all have much more of a punch and do more to drive the plot than the big explosion, which in the grander scheme of things are just little incidences (not to detract from those explosions though).

It’s the this balance between intimacy and chaos which really makes The Dark Knight Rises stand out. Where Nolan could easily slip into the same line as the campy destruction of New York in The Avengers or the overall ridiculousness of The Amazing Spider-Man’s villain, the series has done well to keep itself grounded in reality. Each character has a chance to slip into the cartoonish nature that Tim Burton or the Animated Series opted for, instead going for characters that wouldn’t feel out of place in real life, just with added theatrics to it. This is what makes Nolan’s series so great.
Thematically, the series has always been strong and The Dark Knight Rises is the perfect conclusion to that. Batman Begins was all about fear and how overcoming that fear would make you strong with the Scarecrow/Ra’s al-Ghul literally utilising it to control Gotham. The Dark Knight was all about hope and how having hope can make you stronger with the introduction of “Gotham’s White Knight” Harvey Dent and The Joker’s downfall being due to his naive assumption that the people of Gotham no longer have hope. The Dark Knight Rises does something interesting and completely 180s these ideas. Here, a lack of fear makes one weak and it is the existence of fear which gives many people a driving motivation. Here also, an over reliance on hope makes for a weaker and more placid people. A balance needs to be struck between fear and hope to find a perfect middle ground in which to create the perfect hero of which even Batman is not until he realises this.

I think it’s fair to say that Nolan’s Batman trilogy is one of the best collection of superhero films ever created. What bad moments they have in them feel nitpicky. They’re not faultless but the faults are nowhere near as gaping and destructive as in, say, Spider-Man 3 but everything surrounding those faults is fresh and interesting and has done a hell of a job to revive a hero whose reputation had all but been thrown to the ground and stomped on by the heel of Batman & Robin. The Dark Knight Rises manages to provide a satisfying conclusion (although the end, again, contains some nitpicky things) to potentially one of the best trilogies put to screen and can sit alongside The Godfather et al.

Also, Anne Hathaway. In lycra. Yep.

Last Resort review [November 5th 2012 in The Courier]

What do you get when you mix Tom Clancy with Lost? An unlikely mixture, sure, but it comes out looking like the newest edition of Sky1’s Autumn line up, Last Resort. This exciting original series sees Navy submarine captain Marcus Chaplin refusing to fire nukes on Pakistan at the order of a shady message from the government. Such a decision has terrible consequences that lead his own countrymen to chase down his sub in an attempt to destroy it and everyone on board, while he attempts to grapple with the ever increasing frustrations of his crew as they take over an island in French Polynesia (also known as The Island from Lost. Seriously, it’s the exact same island. ABC clearly just thought, “Let’s go back to Hawaii”).

It’s a strange premise that might not necessarily work but what we have in the first few episodes sure is exciting. Tensions rise exponentially as the crew members of the Colorado come to terms with the fact they are now deemed traitors to the United States, hiding on some tropical island. These tensions aren’t helped by the local inhabitants of said island, including Julian, the local crimelord, unhappy with the recent visitors. And then, back home, we see struggles to root out a conspiracy in the government as well as the fallout of having family members be deemed traitors, as with the Executive Officer’s wife.

The highlights come in the performance, with Marcus Chaplin played by Andre Braugher, one of those masters of monologues who could sell you your own trousers. His presence is both authoritative yet paternal; a more than believable lead for a show such as this. The supporting cast is not to be laughed at either, featuring Robert Patrick in full jowly angry mode as Chief of Boat Joseph Prosser and Scott Speedman as Executive Officer Sam Kendal. There’s also plenty of “them from that thing” material here including Taylor from The OC and Sierra from Dollhouse.

Whether it will last more than a season is yet to become clear, but for now let’s just sit back and watch one of the best original series to come out this Autumn.

Whole Lotta History: A Girls Aloud Retrospective [October 22nd 2012 in The Courier]

In the wake of comeback single ‘Something New’ released at the end of last week, Chris Taylor takes a look back at just a few of the Girls’ masterpieces, and looks at whether the new track stands up in comparison

Sound of the Underground (2002)
Straight off the back of Popstars: The Rivals, Girls Aloud come out with perhaps the greatest pop tune of the noughties, full of Dick Dale style American surf rock guitars and harsh electronic beats.

Jump (2003)
One year in and the Girls have reached the point where they’re making songs for films. It’s sort of like a rite of passage for pop groups, like doing the Tesco advert for comedians.

 Love Machine (2004)
Let’s be honest, it doesn’t really make any coherent sense, but boy is it a great pop tune. Leading on from the jump of ‘Jump’ into the buoyant pop world, ‘Love Machine’ was the best example of the new, bouncier Girls.

Biology (2005)
‘Biology’ brought Girls Aloud back to the infectious pop we know and love. Bits of Neneh Cherry here, bits of cabaret there, it was one of those pop singles that people who ‘don’t like pop’ absolutely loved!

Something Kinda Ooooh (2006)
This was a culmination of everything that came before it in one song. After a couple of ballads to take the fun out of Girls Aloud, ‘Something Kinda Ooooh’ is a meshing together of all the previous experiments which brought it right back.

Walk This Way (2007)
There’s not much to say about this except it brought together both Girls Aloud and Sugababes to do a cover of the Aerosmith/Run DMC classic. What more do you need?

Something New (2012)
After a long, long wait the Girls finally return this year with ‘Something New’, a gorgeous pop banger which appropriates the club sound Xenomania have used with The Saturdays and blends it with some of Girls Aloud’s more mental idiosyncrasies.

Anatomy of Bond [October 22nd 2012 in The Courier]

Let’s just start this off by saying I own every single Bond film on DVD (apart from Never Say Never Again which I like to pretend never happened). This makes me as much an authority on Bond as drinking lots of wine in one evening makes you an authority on wine but I sure know my way around a Bond film. Even I, a die-hard Bond apologist, will readily admit that most Bond films do follow a very similar structure and, at times, can become very B-movie esque. And yet I still love them so. They’re the ultimate in comfort viewing. Down with the flu? Just throw on The Spy Who Loved Me and watch a car work underwater! Underwater! It’s this completely nuts form of escapism that is the true appeal of Bond to me and many others.

But what goes into making a Bond film? By now, there is a pretty neat formula in place that hasn’t really been strayed from until Casino Royale and the reboot of the franchise. Post Casino Royale has has the girls, the action and the pithy one-liners but has been distinctly lacking in gadgets and overly grotesque villains, opting more for the realism and gritty tones of Fleming’s original books (bar Le Chiffre’s tear duct malfunctions, the main feature of this villain is his sheer cunning. He has no gimmick, just a desire to win). You could liken the Daniel Craig reboot (who was derided before even a single piece of footage was release and yet has become one of the best Bonds since Brosnan in Goldeneye or Roger Moore in any of them) to Christopher Nolan’s reboot of the Batman franchise, although Quantum of Solace is definitely no The Dark Knight.

Pre-Casino Royale is where this established formula is most evident, however. This is the Bond that ITV used to show every single Bank Holiday. This is the one most people are familiar with. Here we find Bond girls with ridiculous names, usually with a sexual innuendo involved (Pussy Galore, Xenia Onatopp, Christmas Jones), villains with three nipples or an icy stare, ridiculous secret bases (You Only Live Twice’s fantastic volcano base), gadgets galore (hover gondolas, exploding pens, shoes with daggers in them) and plenty more sexual innuendos for good measure, including my personal favourite, “I though Christmas only comes once a year” (Q’s excellent “I think he’s attempting re-entry” from Moonraker is a close second).

Then there are the more stylistic choices; the big, bombastic themes, the beautiful and often times weird title sequences and the gun barrel. The gun barrel is a particular staple that hasn’t changed that much at all. Daniel Kleinman, who created the Casino Royale title sequence, revealed that Casino Royale actually explains the gun barrel sequence; signifying 007’s first kill, made at the start of Casino Royale.

While the rejigging of the Bond formula by Casino Royale was probably a good thing for the franchise, it’s nice to see that the Daniel Craig Bond films don’t stray too far; keeping what made Bond close by.

Girls Season 1 [October 22nd 2012 in The Courier]

The hit HBO show based around a group of twenty something girls living in Brooklyn is ready to hit UK shores courtesy of Sky Atlantic. Created by “mumblecore” indie darling Lena Dunham in collaboration with Judd Apatow, creator of some of the more realistic modern comedies, Girls is set to slot right in between Gossip Girl and Sex and the City. The former is based around late teens/early 20 year olds and the latter focused on women getting ready to settle down, but there is nothing in between for those trying to figure out their life. Dunham has said that the characters in Girls have all been drawn to New York by Sex and the City and were now trying to fit into this adult life in which they have been thrust.

From working terrible temp jobs to dealing with a relationship that is gradually getting stale and another purely based on sex, the characters in Girls slowly work their way through these scenarios with equal mix of drama and humour, with a bit of added pretention to let you know they are trust-fund, 20-somethings in Brooklyn. It’s interesting to watch the characters develop as the season goes on, particularly Hannah (played by Dunham herself). While we might think that Hannah is just thrust into these situations, as she starts to realise the way things actually are, particularly with her lover Adam, so does the viewer as the focus widens and we see the bigger picture, not just what Hannah wants us to see.

It feels a lot more accessible to men than its most obvious comparison Sex and the City which is perhaps a result of the carefully crafted storylines and relatable characters. It feels like a real slow burner but it probably works in its advantage. Spending most of the season loathing Adam, his progression led to me find him one of the best characters on the show by the end. A Sex and the City for the facebook and Instagram generation!

Cabin in the Woods [April 23rd 2012 in The Courier]

There are that types of film that are so formulaic, if you just stuck to the basic structure and added whichever actors were popular at the time, you’d have guaranteed success. Those are romantic comedy and horror (although in the latter, you have to pull those actors limb from limb). Parodies on this formula have, for the most part, been better for horrors. You’ve had the Scream series, a postmodern love letter to the “horror rules”, the Scary Movie series and the fantastic Tucker and Dale vs Evil. The next addition to the postmodern dissection of horror movies is The Cabin in the Woods from two men who know a lot about the genre. Drew Goddard wrote the terrific monster movie Cloverfield and Joss Whedon wrote most of the well-loved Buffy The Vampire Slayer series, whilst both being huge fans of the genre itself.

The Cabin in the Woods takes two perspectives. The main one is that of a group of five kids getting ready for a vacation to the arse end of nowhere for a week of sex, drugs and skinny dipping. One’s your typical sexy girl, another’s a stoner (the scene stealing Fran Kranz), a jock (de-Thored Chris Hemsworth), a nerd and finally the innocent girl. But you know something’s not right with the formula when the jock is actually a sociology major and the innocent girl had an illicit affair with her college professor. Then we meet two white collar workers, Sitterson (the superb as always Richard Jenkins) and Hadley (Bradley Whitford) tasked with doing “something”. Revealing their actual end goal is a huge spoiler but let’s just say the interactions between the two in their “office” are some of the funniest scenes in the film.

Of course, it all hits the fan when the kids end up fiddling about with things in the basement and they get assaulted by grotesque evils on all sides. This continues in not-so-standard horror movie fashion until one of the most surreal climax sequences that would give the elevator scene from The Shining a run for its money in terms of blood used.

The poster for the film sees your standard horror movie cabin being twisted and distorted like a floating Rubik’s cube and is a pretty good metaphor for the film as a whole. Your expectations will be twisted around and thrown against a window. The Cabin in the Woods cleverly plays with the smugness of horror movie fans. It follows the formula of a horror movie, allowing those accustomed to the “Rules” to settle, but then suddenly flips it on its head and then the ride never ends.

VERDICT: Although the material used that of slasher horror films, is not as relevant as it was with Scream, when the 90s was booming with the things, the satirical take on the genre is still a fast, entertaining ride that is surprisingly funny (well not really, because Joss Whedon wrote it) and just generally a fantastic ride from beginning to end.

4/5